So, what happens when mommy needs to go away leaving New Baby and Poppy home to their own devices? This is a question that so many would chomp at the bit to use as a satirical opportunity to make dad’s the butt of yet another awkward incompetence joke, you know like, “How many politicians does it take to change a light bulb?” But being the self-respecting author/father that I am, I just can’t let you do that and get away with it. Oh no...
It was a sad day in many ways. My wife Simone’s great friend’s mom passed and she had to decide whether to go down south to support her friend in person leaving baby Josiah behind, or staying home and supporting her from afar. Supporting her from afar would have been more than understandable since Josiah was born just more than two months ago. Now, there are a few things you’ll need to know as you formulate your opinion: First, like every good mommy, Simone was completely torn, because she loves her son so much. Second, Josiah has been bottle and breast fed from the time he was born, due to complications in the hospital. Third, I have been home doing my part on Family Medical Leave since he was born. Now, back to our regularly scheduled program. It was becoming clear that Simone needed to go down south. It’s complicated. We have been making certain that we Skype, share pics, and call regularly, to minimize the anxiety Simone experiences while on travel.
I remember a woman at one of our many baby showers jeering, “We should record this so we can hold you to that” when I verbalized that a certain aspect of caring for Josiah would be a piece of cake. First of all, there ain’t no “we” that needs to hold me to that. My responsibility is to Simone and Josiah. I’m sure it was meant as a joke, but...I digress. When I say that me taking care of our son is a piece of cake, I do not mean it’s easy. Is it easy to bake a cake? It’s all a matter of perspective. There are box cakes that can easily be made by cracking the seal, dumping the mix into a bowl, adding water and eggs, mixing for about a minute, pouring the batter into a nonstick bundt pan, shoving it into an oven preheated to 350 degrees, and the cake is done before Oprah goes to commercial three times. And true, there are fathers who take this approach with parenting. Some take shortcuts and cut corners and the consequence is evident in their children. Then there’s the delicate lemon chiffon topped with rose-scented whipped cream or a carrot cake bejeweled with ruby red dried cranberries, orange zest, walnuts & pecans, and coconut. I am fairly certain, neither Mrs. Lee nor Mrs. Crocker have figured out how to cram either of these gourmet masterpieces into one of those cardboard boxes in the baking aisle of your local grocery. BTW - If you are health conscious like I am, you probably don’t want to eat any of the aforementioned cakes. There I go again. Anyway, if a father takes the gourmet approach to care-taking, nothing short of excellence will be the result. Indeed there will be lumps in the parental batter on occasion and maybe the paternal oven may go on the blink, but with God’s help and enough time and practice, everything will work out just fine.
So you’re wondering what does happen when mommy needs to go away leaving New Baby and Poppy home to their own devices? Poppy and Baby still breathe, feed, burp, cuddle, reassure, sleep, change, bathe, clear Baby’s nostrils, do laundry, go to the car wash, monitor Ebay listings, clean the shower stalls, clean the toilets, sweep, go to get immunizations, go to Common Market and Walmart for supplies, write blogs, shower, shave, watch an episode or two of who knows what, Skype mommy, pray, read the Bible, console the baby, take care of the cradle cap condition, scrub the kitchen sink bright white, shuttle the garbage down the driveway, periodically administer Colic Calm, patiently await mommy’s return, etc., etc. That is to say, life goes on. What did you think? And all of this is a piece of cake, gourmet that is. Oooo, I gotta go. Josiah just woke up!
Stay tuned for my entry titled, “That’s Mr. DAD to You!”
It was a sad day in many ways. My wife Simone’s great friend’s mom passed and she had to decide whether to go down south to support her friend in person leaving baby Josiah behind, or staying home and supporting her from afar. Supporting her from afar would have been more than understandable since Josiah was born just more than two months ago. Now, there are a few things you’ll need to know as you formulate your opinion: First, like every good mommy, Simone was completely torn, because she loves her son so much. Second, Josiah has been bottle and breast fed from the time he was born, due to complications in the hospital. Third, I have been home doing my part on Family Medical Leave since he was born. Now, back to our regularly scheduled program. It was becoming clear that Simone needed to go down south. It’s complicated. We have been making certain that we Skype, share pics, and call regularly, to minimize the anxiety Simone experiences while on travel.
I remember a woman at one of our many baby showers jeering, “We should record this so we can hold you to that” when I verbalized that a certain aspect of caring for Josiah would be a piece of cake. First of all, there ain’t no “we” that needs to hold me to that. My responsibility is to Simone and Josiah. I’m sure it was meant as a joke, but...I digress. When I say that me taking care of our son is a piece of cake, I do not mean it’s easy. Is it easy to bake a cake? It’s all a matter of perspective. There are box cakes that can easily be made by cracking the seal, dumping the mix into a bowl, adding water and eggs, mixing for about a minute, pouring the batter into a nonstick bundt pan, shoving it into an oven preheated to 350 degrees, and the cake is done before Oprah goes to commercial three times. And true, there are fathers who take this approach with parenting. Some take shortcuts and cut corners and the consequence is evident in their children. Then there’s the delicate lemon chiffon topped with rose-scented whipped cream or a carrot cake bejeweled with ruby red dried cranberries, orange zest, walnuts & pecans, and coconut. I am fairly certain, neither Mrs. Lee nor Mrs. Crocker have figured out how to cram either of these gourmet masterpieces into one of those cardboard boxes in the baking aisle of your local grocery. BTW - If you are health conscious like I am, you probably don’t want to eat any of the aforementioned cakes. There I go again. Anyway, if a father takes the gourmet approach to care-taking, nothing short of excellence will be the result. Indeed there will be lumps in the parental batter on occasion and maybe the paternal oven may go on the blink, but with God’s help and enough time and practice, everything will work out just fine.
So you’re wondering what does happen when mommy needs to go away leaving New Baby and Poppy home to their own devices? Poppy and Baby still breathe, feed, burp, cuddle, reassure, sleep, change, bathe, clear Baby’s nostrils, do laundry, go to the car wash, monitor Ebay listings, clean the shower stalls, clean the toilets, sweep, go to get immunizations, go to Common Market and Walmart for supplies, write blogs, shower, shave, watch an episode or two of who knows what, Skype mommy, pray, read the Bible, console the baby, take care of the cradle cap condition, scrub the kitchen sink bright white, shuttle the garbage down the driveway, periodically administer Colic Calm, patiently await mommy’s return, etc., etc. That is to say, life goes on. What did you think? And all of this is a piece of cake, gourmet that is. Oooo, I gotta go. Josiah just woke up!
Stay tuned for my entry titled, “That’s Mr. DAD to You!”
You know you are a good Dad, David. Josiah would be fine in your hands any day of the week. I'm sure it's comforting to Simone, as much as she misses you both, to know that her family will not fall apart in her absence. You have to admit, though, that you are the exception, not the rule.
ReplyDeleteContinue to be the standard-bearer. I share your blog so that other Dad's might pick up on your attitude of service with their families. I share so that other Moms may see that there is a higher standard to hold their husbands to.
P.S. I love cake. :-)
Sue,
ReplyDeleteYou are beyond kind. As all fathers, I am a rough work in progress. I am thankful for the work thus far, especially since my dad was a poor example in the home.
Thanks much for sharing with others, because I want these and other media to which I contribute, to be principled change agents. I have seen many times how social media has made inestimable impact on the larger society. I want to leverage that power.
Have you visited my new Twitter page yet? Here's a link: https://twitter.com/#!/irockthecradle2
BTW - I love cake too. There...I said it.