Preterm "Labor"

“Preterm labor (also called premature labor) is labor that begins before 37 weeks of pregnancy.  Because the fetus is not fully grown at this time, it may not be able to survive outside the womb.  Health care providers will often take steps to try to stop labor if it occurs before this time. A baby born before 37 weeks of pregnancy is considered a preterm birth (or premature birth).  Preterm births occur in about 12 percent of all pregnancies in the U.S.  It is one of the top causes of infant death in this country.” ¹

Simone and I had one last baby shower at just about 35 weeks of pregnancy. Up until that point many provisions had been made for us to receive our son into his new home. The nursery was painted, arranged, and decorated, many of the clothes were put away, and his hospital bag was packed. Since we had been primed from the start for a planned cesarean section at 39 weeks, we were not too concerned that the hospital was almost 100 miles from our house. There were a couple of hospitals nearby in case there was an emergency. Being the planner that I am, six-months before the proposed c section appointment I booked a week long stay at a hotel just two miles from the hospital, and an even shorter distance from the Whole Foods food bar. I must admit that I was a bit smug when people were horrified at the distance from the hospital we lived whenever we would tell them about the hotel booking. At the same time, I thought perhaps it was a good idea not to lock in a lower rate for the hotel by paying up front, just in case we needed to move the appointment. Ah...preparation!

The day following our final baby shower, Simone, my mother-in-law, and I were in for a scheduled prenatal visit equidistant from our house and the hospital. Simone was very uncomfortable as usual. She often had additional pain due to complications. There came a point in the pregnancy where it appeared that the baby was turning her inside out and her belly was visibly contorting in strange ways (you’d just have to see it). As we slowly walked into the office, we were greeted by the nurse and Simone mentioned that she was in pain. Since we had a great relationship with the particular nurse, she jokingly asked Simone if she was in labor. She continued the sympathetic fun by saying, “Since you’re in labor, let’s get you hooked up to the monitor.” So they did. The nurse kept checking the readouts and then the doctor came in. He did his normal greeting and assessment. Once he examined her and read the monitor’s results he said, “You are two centimeters dilated and if your contractions continue...” he gave us the formula “for one hour in this way, get to the hospital. You are in labor.” Awe-stricken we were in a bit of a daze. Simone started shaking and saying, “I’m gonna have a baby?!” I pulled out my trusty contraction timer app (there really is an app for that), and after some discussion, my mother-in-law stayed at the office, my mother left work immediately, went to pick up my mother-in-law, they both went to our house to rummage our things and get our bags packed to drive back the almost 100 miles to the hospital. Simone and I went to the hospital straight away since it was an hour from the doctor’s office. Shew! We were having a BABY!

Once we arrived at the emergency room, and explained everything, Simone was whisked away to the L&D section of the hospital for observation. To make an incredibly long story short, after a long time of observation, Simone’s labor had not progressed, so on a technicality, we were able to stay the night in the high-risk unit since we were being booted out of the area in which we were. Amidst all of the rush, we prayed. Specifically, because of Simone’s profession and expertise in health care of children, we prayed for the baby to stay inside just one more week, and that he would not need to be hooked up to any machines once he arrived or have any complications. The following morning, we were released and what I call, “the dry run” was complete. Immediately, I thought it was a great object lesson for us. I had a very well organized plan that included specific time-lines for packing my SUV, hotel stays, leave from work, etc. I thought of the fact that no person knows when Jesus will return and that it is incumbent upon us to be ready, not be getting ready, for His arrival. Even though I am a planner, and have not gotten caught unprepared before, this dry run exploited my humanity. There are some things we simply cannot anticipate. So, I said to Simone that we must not become lax because the boy had not yet come. We should learn a lesson from believers who have been expecting the Lord’s arrival for many years until they had lost hope. We were definitely not equating our son with the Lord. We were simply applying the verse in the book of Romans that equates the birthing and expectation process with awaiting Jesus’ return. 

Another lesson was reinforced for me. God indeed answers prayer. Simone had been seeing two doctors who were a part of the same group throughout the pregnancy. The first doctor is the one who mentioned the planned c section. I immediately started praying against it, because I wanted Simone not to be mutilated. I am well aware that many children were necessarily delivered that way and that the incisions are very good these days. I still consider it mutilation. Simone had accepted the reality that we would have the c section. I begged the Lord to spare us. There are many benefits to the child coming through the canal if possible. I asked the Lord to overrule Simone’s complications and make it possible. At 35 weeks of pregnancy the second doctor said he was not aware of any such “plan.” Hallelujah! One week later to the day, Simone woke me up and said she was leaking fluid. We monitored it for an appropriate period of time and when it was apparent that it was amniotic fluid, we got dressed and drove in my fully packed and prepared SUV to the hospital 100 miles away--no stress. Several minutes after we arrived, her water broke. Late that night, our son was born without c section. Praise the Lord! There were complications, but God protected us. He answered our prayer of bringing us to 36 weeks, no machines, and no c section. 

The preterm labor for fathers only includes stories like these. This does not even scratch the surface. Standing by as your wife goes through severe physical and emotional changes, without being able to do much about it is labor. Watching her go through pain that cannot even be described is labor. Hoping that the child is safe and sound is labor. Wondering how you two are going to provide for the child is labor. Emergency room visits, night time phone consults, and bed-rest is labor. A severe modification in sexual activity due to pregnancy is labor. Listening to the endless rounds of horror stories and bad advice is labor. And all of that is just the beginning. I could go on, but you get the point. All of this and more is labor, but it is a labor of L-O-V-E.

Are you up for it?

¹"Preterm Labor and Birth."NICHD - The Eunice Kennedy Shriver National Institute of Child Health and Human Development Official Home Page. N.p., 2 Aug. 2010. Web. 11 Feb. 2011.